Ironically, the two most intimate moments in our lives are events we don't remember. Our birth, and our death.
I have witnessed the beginning, of my own two beautiful children, and the end, of my dear friend Alex's mother. Neither of us were present for her actual death, but we were there to share moments when we could talk to her and do things for her, as well as after she fell into a coma, never to awaken again.
It's been just over a week.
A week where we have shared tears and laughter, made plans, gone through boxes, and just done nothing. A week where we shared a bittersweet holiday. A week when just knowing that I was there was a comfort.
Each day will go on, life will go on, and I will be there for Alex as she goes through the stages of grief. There have been, and will be good days and bad days. Days of laughter, family and fun, and days of tears, anger, and a heaviness that feels crushing at times.
Monday, November 28, 2011
Sunday, November 13, 2011
4 kids, one love, 72 hours.
72 hours.
That is approximately how much time I spent away this weekend. Away from the home where I rest my head ~6 nights a week.
It was busy, and wonderful. All of the kids were home. It amazes me how sometimes 4 kids can be easier than having just 2. Sometimes it all just works out so that they get along and play nicely keeping themselves and each other occupied. This was one of those weekends. For the first time in about a month, my two monkeys were able to calm down and go to sleep at their normal times. That means they're starting to adjust to the change in location on the weekends. That is good for me. They're transitioning well to the changes in all of our lives. The other two also seem to be adjusting to the changes in their lives. It must be hard for all four of them, but they all seem to be rolling with the punches and adjusting fairly well. There are still many changes on the horizon, but as long as everyone involved continues to support the kiddos through all of the changes I think that everything will work out well in the long run.
Along with the 4 kids, I got to spend the weekend with my love. 2 whole nights. It doesn't sound like much, but I usually only get 1 night, so it was bliss. We work well together. We communicate well, have a wonderful loving, supportive relationship, and I just feel at peace when I'm with him. I look forward to the day when I get to spend every night with him.
The weekend ended with a celebration. A birthday party. Dinner was tacos, and dessert was a flourless chocolate cake that turned out pretty awesome. It was nice to spend time with the whole family, however strange our little family may be. The family that consists of friends and children that when put together act as one family unit. I hope that we can continue the closeness that we all have despite all of the changes that have, and will come. It may not be traditional, but it's my family, my reality, and I truly love it.
That is approximately how much time I spent away this weekend. Away from the home where I rest my head ~6 nights a week.
It was busy, and wonderful. All of the kids were home. It amazes me how sometimes 4 kids can be easier than having just 2. Sometimes it all just works out so that they get along and play nicely keeping themselves and each other occupied. This was one of those weekends. For the first time in about a month, my two monkeys were able to calm down and go to sleep at their normal times. That means they're starting to adjust to the change in location on the weekends. That is good for me. They're transitioning well to the changes in all of our lives. The other two also seem to be adjusting to the changes in their lives. It must be hard for all four of them, but they all seem to be rolling with the punches and adjusting fairly well. There are still many changes on the horizon, but as long as everyone involved continues to support the kiddos through all of the changes I think that everything will work out well in the long run.
Along with the 4 kids, I got to spend the weekend with my love. 2 whole nights. It doesn't sound like much, but I usually only get 1 night, so it was bliss. We work well together. We communicate well, have a wonderful loving, supportive relationship, and I just feel at peace when I'm with him. I look forward to the day when I get to spend every night with him.
The weekend ended with a celebration. A birthday party. Dinner was tacos, and dessert was a flourless chocolate cake that turned out pretty awesome. It was nice to spend time with the whole family, however strange our little family may be. The family that consists of friends and children that when put together act as one family unit. I hope that we can continue the closeness that we all have despite all of the changes that have, and will come. It may not be traditional, but it's my family, my reality, and I truly love it.
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Reaching out
Reaching out for friends
Old and new
Friends who'll help me to get through
Friends who'll listen
Friends who'll talk
Friends who'll hold me
Reaching out for love
Old and new
Love to lift me up
Love that's true
Reaching out for help
Old and new
Friends who'll help me to get through
Friends who'll listen
Friends who'll talk
Friends who'll hold me
Reaching out for love
Old and new
Love to lift me up
Love that's true
Reaching out for help
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Unconditional love
Yesterday I went to the hospital, with Alex to meet her mother. Her mom is a beautiful person. Her mom is dying.
Yesterday, I witnessed unconditional love. Love between a mother and daughter. Alex's strength is amazing to me. She goes up, takes care of her mother, paints her nails, lotions her hands, talks to her even though her mother can't communicate as well as she once could. Any time that she has with her mom is so precious to her, and you can see that from both of them. I'm in awe of Alex. How strong she is when she's at the hospital. I don't know that I would be able to have that same strength. Everyone handles things so differently, and these two women are handling an emotional situation with such grace.
Next weekend, I hope to return and spend more time with these amazing women. I can learn much from seeing their interactions, the grace in which they handle life, and death.
I feel honored that I was invited into such and intimate time between mother and daughter.
I can only hope that I will be able to someday offer the support and love that I have seen to my family.
Yesterday, I witnessed unconditional love. Love between a mother and daughter. Alex's strength is amazing to me. She goes up, takes care of her mother, paints her nails, lotions her hands, talks to her even though her mother can't communicate as well as she once could. Any time that she has with her mom is so precious to her, and you can see that from both of them. I'm in awe of Alex. How strong she is when she's at the hospital. I don't know that I would be able to have that same strength. Everyone handles things so differently, and these two women are handling an emotional situation with such grace.
Next weekend, I hope to return and spend more time with these amazing women. I can learn much from seeing their interactions, the grace in which they handle life, and death.
I feel honored that I was invited into such and intimate time between mother and daughter.
I can only hope that I will be able to someday offer the support and love that I have seen to my family.
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