Speaking and listening

"I am determined to practice deep listening. I am determined to practice loving speech."
— Thich Nhat Hanh

When was the last time you listened to someone?  Did you actually listen, or just hear what they had to say?  There is a huge difference, and I know I'm guilty of hearing what people say without actually listening.  Just this weekend, as I sat in class, I heard everything that the professor said, but didn't actively listen the whole time.  I spent a lot of time just scanning what he was saying and doing other things on the computer while he yammered on.  I'm guilty of this in other aspects too.  Sometimes I'll get bored of hearing what people have to say and just listen and nod my head at the appropriate times.  These are the conversations that I'm unable to recall when the issues are brought up another time. 

This week, I will practice active, deep listening.  At home, in class, at work, and at therapy.  Especially in my relationships.  Those with friends, and family.

Loving speech is not always easy.  When I'm annoyed, I tend to get sharp with my words, my tone, and my demeanor.  It was pointed out to me this weekend that I do this.  I wasn't even consciously aware that I was doing it.  I heard what was said to me, and I listened to what was said to me.  I will now work on changing that particular behavior.  For me, loving speech is the hardest to do when it's needed the most.  When I'm annoyed by things, when something goes wrong, when I'm told something I don't want to hear.  I suspect, that by being aware of my tone, and using loving speech instead of barking directions, that everyone in my family unit will be much happier.